Monday, February 27, 2012
Even though I have written about this in a while, I still think about the what ifs. Had a melt down when I got home from Marley Christening. I think I was worried about seeing all those people and got myself worked up so when I got home I just cried and cried.
John gave James a big teddy shaped biscuit. At first he wasn't sure what to make of it and just smiled not realising he could eat it. Then he took a nibble and started laughing. Found it very funny and kept giggling while munching on it. It was a little like an evil laugh.
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
John has found a new way of making James laugh. He pretends to be a dog and chases him. James pretends to crawl away but he isn't to sure John will follow him so he keeps checking.
Today James ate a spare rib, to odd to think of a 1 year old eating a rib off the bone, but the baby led weaning allows him to do it. He also have rice and curry. Hopefully he won't be picky as he grows. John gave him one of his peas out of his rice. He was so happy, it must be nice to find really small thing thrilling.
Monday, February 20, 2012
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO JAMES. I can't believe it has been a year, it has gone so quickly. We have had a lovely day. James woke us up just gone 7 and he came into our bed and open one of his presents, a car. Then we went downstairs and shown him all the decorations, cards and presents. He first spotted the football and opened it without any help. Then he spotted the balloon from Marleys party yesterday and forgot all about his prezzie and played with his balloon and ball. After a birthday breakfast, I made some, cakes, scones and brownies. We opened a few more presents and cards. Mega blocks from Holly, another car and hammer thing from John and I, gear set from Dad. He had a early nap because he was so tired from yesterday. While he was asleep Vic popped round. After a birthday dinner with a cake and candle there was more playing. At 2:00 Terry and Grandma arrived. James had more presents some lovely clothes and bath toys. Katie, Rod and Colleen turn up a bit later and he got a sit and ride on tractor and a pop up tunnel. Grandad and Grandma Metcalf arrive later with lovely clothes and sweeties. Mum came with Nanny and he got some nice book. Auntie Kerry got him some smart clothes. Vic got him a very neat egg and solider set. He also got some money from both Great Grandma's, Vic, Mum and Auntie Janet.
We had a very nice tea and more cake. I made James a birthday cake. It wasn't my best effort, but it was ok. James played lots and figured out how to use all his presents. He is now tucked up in bed fast asleep. He will have another busy day tomorrow have a good look at all his toys and playing. I'm also about ready for bed, it has been a long day. x
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Friday, February 17, 2012
Feeling at a bit of a loose end at the moment. Mum is having James for a couple of days, we took him there this afternoon. Just rang her to see if he was alright. He had been to see a client of mums and had a lovely time playing the electric organ and playing with a fake cat! It is odd that he is not here and so quiet without him. I keep thinking that he is having a long nap.
I'm feeling poorly at the moment, have a horrid cold. Was hoping to have time with John and do lots of nice thing, but all I feel like is curling up with a hot water bottle.
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
I can't believe a year has gone by. Marley (nephew) is celebrating his 1st birthday today. It has come around so quickly. He is having a Christening and 1st birthday party on Sunday. We have got him a bottle of vintage port for his Christening present. He can drink it when he turns 18, that if there is any left as Peter, Col and Katie have a taste for port. We have got him a jigsaw for his present and some wooden story models.
In 5 days time it will be James turn. Think I will have to make a birthday cake. I'm think of a number 1, iced with stickers all over it. I'm not that great at decorating but I will have a go. We are having a small party with Grandparents. James has got some cars for his garage, a football, wooden story models and wooden ball thing you hit.
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Went to the pictures last night to see Woman in Black. I had read the book the previous week, so was interested to see what the film was like. Unfortunately, I was rather disappointed. Perhaps I shouldn't have read the book first, because from the moment the film started it veered away from the original story. If fact it was so different that it could have had a different title and been a film in its own right. As for being a scary horror movie, it tended to reply on cheap things jumping out and dramatic music to add the element of fear. It should have relied on the story itself being creepy and keeping the tension. It was an OK film, but not fantastic. I would love to see the theatre production to see it take on the book.
Thursday, February 09, 2012
Have had a bit better day to day. Spent some time this morning while James was having his morning nap to make some piece of jewellery using my microwave kiln. The other day I order a new glass cutter because the one I have is poor and I end up with lots of waste uneven glass. This is a Toyo make and is super, very easy to use. So I had a nice time playing with that and some glass I ordered. Made 2 pendants. After dinner John and I took James to the park on the swings, not for long as it was cold and started to snow. Than we got ours selves warm through with cake and tea. John wandered off home while James and I looked round the shops. James fell asleep in Boots. I only bought a new plastic mat to go under James high chair to catch all his food he throws.
When to the hospital yesterday for what I thought was the final scan. I was hoping that this would be the last thing and then I could move on. Not forget, just start to get back to normal and work. Unfortunately, this was not to be. The scan picked up that there was some tissue left. This get prove to be a problem if I get an infection. There was back to the options of pill, leave it or operation. I have chosen to leave it till next week and hopefully fingers crossed it will sort its self out. I have a scan booked for next Thursday at 10. If it hasn't gone by then I'm going to take to pill. I doesn't sound a good option but better than the operation. Feeling down still and angry about it, which John is getting.
Tuesday, February 07, 2012
James is his new Fisher Price Ez clean. highchair. It is a little more snug then his other one and I'm hoping it lasts. It seems a lot easier to clean and hopefully it won't stain like the other one. It is a bit chunky when it is folded but that won't be a problem in the new house because it will be left up. X
Before the weekend John found that our highchair has a tear in it where the fabric pushes against the plastic as it is folded. I was so annoyed as we have only been using it 5 months and it was quite expensive. Email Mothercare twice and got no reply. However made a comment on facebook and they got in touch with me straight away. Rang me yesterday and ask if I would like another one. Chose a Fisher Price Easy Clean. It arrived today. Fantastic customer service. I was very impressed as I had set myself up into having to argue my case. Very pleased with the chair as well.
Not a great day today. Feeling quite low again. I helps me write things down here. I don't think I will every post these post though. Just here for my own outlet. Still sleeping poorly. John asked me to get up about 9:15 I wish he hadn't. I had an awful headache and James was screaming in his high chair while eating his breakfast. All I wanted to do was sleep and think.
I just want sometime on my own. I wanted to go into town this afternoon, but John was wanting to get some balloons ordered and I felt bad because him looking after James wouldn't allow him to do that. Then he wanted us all to go to B and Q. I just wanted to go and have a quiet coffee and a look round the shops.
I'm bored with the routine things. I get up, feed James, change him, dress him. Then we play or I watch him until nap time 10:30 then he get up and I change him and start dinner, forward by clearing up. Then more play/watching TV, then nap at 3:30. Forward by me cooking tea and feeding him, changing him, PJs on and a quick play before he goes to bed. Then it is telly on. That is my day and it has been for weeks. I'm so fed up. John does help tidy, wash up, washing clothes. But he thinks I just sit in the other room and watch TV. He doesn't seem to play with him as much now. Just sits on his computer and moans about how much he hasn't been able to do.
Monday, February 06, 2012
Have been feeling a little down the last few days. I haven't been sleeping very well, so have been going downstairs to read so I don't disturb John. I'm fine when I'm busy but feeling as if something is missing. Sounds odd. There is a baby I will never get to hold.
After I few tears tonight and John comforting me again. I mentioned to John that I would like a blossom tree in our new garden, thinking that would be a nice way to remember the baby. It gets to me that I will have nothing to remember him by. I didn't tell John that was why I wanted a tree thinking he would think I was being silly. Speaking him tonight he had a similar plan to plant a rose bush at the new house. I think I blossom would be more suitable as James can play under it and it looks beautiful in spring.
Just 2 more days to get through. Tomorrow was meant to be 12 week scan day. I day where I would be able to see my baby. Wednesday is now scan day just to check that everything has gone. Deep breath.
James walked his first few wobbly steps today. Unfortunately John was in the dinning room so he missed it and I didn't yell him through in case he fell over. He was holding on to his bouncing zebra and I had his barking puppet dog and he wanted it, so very carefully he let go and took one step forward wobbled, steadied himself and then took another step and fell onto me and the dog.
Let in the afternoon he took a step just for Daddy in the dinning room. I have just been on the internet and bought him 2 pair of soft leather shoes to celebrate.
Sunday, February 05, 2012
I hate the snow, but feel that I ought to venture out in it to let James experience it wet and cold delights. John has already cleared 2 paths and been to Asda and it only 11:30. Me however have managed to get myself dressed and that is about it.
Right I had better hunt out the wellies and James waterproof.
PS. Rang Grandma this morning and while I was on the phone James sneaked into the kitchen cupboard and pour out all the dried pasta and was attempting to eat it. I felt bad taking him away from it because he was enjoying himself and seemed very pleased at his accomplishment. He even help clear away.
Friday, February 03, 2012
I'm really back into making glass pendants with my Hot Pot microwave kiln. I got it for Christmas two years ago and since having James it was relegated to a box for a while. Plus I thought it was getting old because it was taking nearly an hour to melt the glass, turns out I had melted the microwave. Now we have a new microwave and it take 7.5 minutes. Result! Just takes a bit longer to cool down.
Getting better at cutting glass as well now. I have bought a better glass cutter today in the hope that I won't make as much waste.
Will get some pictures on later.